So Grateful!

Posted 02/27/2017 by Taline Perez

 I am a visual learner. I could not imagine in my mind’s eye what Friday night’s fundraiser was going to look like, even though Barbara described it to me several times. We were very sad that Sergio would not be able to go, and although I never said it out loud, I was thinking that maybe we shouldn’t go either. He’d been left behind and I thought it would be an opportunity to feel alone, without my spouse, and why do that to myself now when I will be forced to feel that later? Yes, we humans do a lot to avoid unpleasant feelings. Not to mention my exhaustion since he is on pain meds now so that means long nights as well.

But Barbara called one last time and reminded me that there would be face painting there. The night before, Nairi had shared with me that she is sad because we don’t do anything fun anymore, well we haven’t in a while. So, I gathered the girls with mixed feelings and told them we have to go to the fundraiser for an hour and then come back. 

Friday night was phenomenal for us and much longer than one hour!

God had other plans. I had just spoken to an old friend and colleague of Sergio’s after school who told me when her father died, she felt so loved and supported. For some reason that conversation freed me to just let everyone love us without guilt. That is what we felt and feel, loved and supported, and it is a blessing!

Like a modern day version of an episode from Little House on The Prairie, when the community rallies together to support a person in need or struggling. It sounds so corny, but it is happening to us! 

I have always known that Sergio was a great teacher, but of a different sort. It had nothing to do with paperwork, curriculum, or testing. His gift is relationships. He’s always had the philosophy that when a kid is loved, the other stuff falls in place. I knew he was good because the first year we got married students would knock on our door just to come by and say hi to him (shocking to me as a high school teacher because we hid our address, which car we drove, etc.), because he constantly got invited to birthday parties by students, to soccer, baseball, basketball, you name it, games, to weddings in Romania and Alabama (and on and on) from past students, because he had almost two hundred mugs in his kitchen cabinets

from students who wanted to give him something for Christmas and he told them he loved mugs so they could all afford something and be able to give him a gift, because he made sure he got to know the siblings, parents and grandparents, and some of those people became his dear friends and ultimately his goal was for kids to know that he loved them. He really did. So relational, truly enjoyed people’s company, and believed that his purpose was to influence and impact others’ lives in a positive way for whatever they needed, for some to let them know that life could be hard, but good, and that there are nice people out there. He expressed these things verbally and very intentionally lived it out. I had asked him why he thought he was who he was and he always said, “God.”

What a blessing it was to see so many of his past students telling us story after story of what he meant in their lives and what he had done for them. I truly appreciate you being willing to share your lives and knowledge about Sergio, my love with me. 

Just like he would tell the girls, “Be on the look out for good people. You can make great friends anywhere.” and there you all were on Friday night. There were tears, lots and lots on my side, and stories of going to Camp Hammer in Santa Cruz, trips to raging water, and ice cream, having a student’s favorite candy in a jar on his desk, making students feel no different than others even if there were differences, being sensitive to health problems, home problems, and personal problems. It was a good night. 

Sergio had wanted a massive birthday party in September for his 50th. His list had hundreds of people on in because he is inclusive. "Why leave someone out if you don’t have to?" was his feeling. "And why limit yourself when there are so many good people out there who enrich our lives and want to be in relationship?" He was in the hospital on his birthday. He got Happy Birthday sung to him three times that day by us, the case manager and the nurses. I have been sad about that and trying to figure out how and when to do that, but Friday might have been better. 

I was speaking to a friend tonight who is still paying off home health care costs and other medical costs seven years after the passing of her mother. I am truly, truly grateful for everything you are doing for the well being of our lives. I love our community in Whittier and beyond! Or more accurately the people who make up these communities, from our neighbors, schools, churches, and friends spread all across its almost 15 square miles, across the states and around the world. I play all of your videos to Sergio and he smiles. 

If you would like to leave a comment but are not a google+ member, you can go to her YOUCARING link and post a comment.   https://www.youcaring.com/sergio-perez-669404  OR email her at talinekorzter@gmail.com
Thanks